It feels really good to not have any major plans tonight, tomorrow and for the rest of the week until Thursday, with the exception of work of course (: I am extremely happy that school is over, for now, and I finally get a break! 2 months of no school, I feel blessed haha. SORRY APEZ! I am SO over going to work and then school – Monday through Friday – 8AM to 9PM; it’s exhausting! I honestly don’t know how I survived that last semester. But hey, you gotta do what you gotta do, right?

I don’t remember what kind of relationship I had with my parents when I was growing up, but I know I was always distant and I never really talked to them. I always kept private and locked myself in the room. I always chose my friends over my family. As of lately I feel like i’ve slowly grown a relationship with my mom and it feels really good to finally be able to talk to her. To talk to her without any opposing sides, arguing, yelling, and disrespecting. I always felt like there was no point in trying to gain a relationship with my mom because she ALWAYS has to be right and because she thinks she knows everything (which is true), but I guess I forgot she’s more than just my mom and that she’s  just like me. I forget that she’s human and not just some crazy lady trying to “ruin” my life. I guess i’ve always seen the negative side of her because I never took the time and effort to see a positive side. I never noticed how truely ungrateful and selfish I was. I mean, I was thankful for everything my parents did for me, but the whole time I really was only thinking about myself. But now that i’ve been able to talk to my mom lately, I noticed how much more she’s done for me. I may not always agree with the things she does or says because everyone has their faults, but she does the best she can do just for me and my brother. She may be a little cray cray, but she’s an extremely strong woman who deserves a lot more credit than she gets – from me at least. I was always scared about what was going to happen when I get older. I always had this feeling that once I move out that I would never talk to my parents again, because I resented them that much. But now things are looking better and I know to never do that. I look at my friends and see the kind of relationship they have with their parents and I always wondered why I didn’t have that, why I couldn’t. Now I know it was because of me, because I was being selfish and one minded – one of the things I hate the most about people. I don’t know if our relationship is getting better because i’m growing older and she’s noticing that and she can talk to me like i’m an adult or if it’s balance for the relationship i’m going to lose soon.  But that’s a whole different story.

I may not have everything, but my life isn’t bad at all. Life is always what you make of it.